Nursing home attendants!

Blonde - Elmo Factory

Once there was a blonde who really needed some money. She saw an ad in the newspaper for a job at an Elmo factory. She went down and applied, but the manager told her that she wouldn't want the job because it was so boring. The blonde begged him and told him she would do anything because she needed the money really bad. After long consideration the manager hired her.
After a few hours the manager looked at the video-monitor showing the factory floor and saw that the conveyer belt was backed up. The manager went downstairs to find out what the problem was. When he arived there the blonde was sewing two marbles into the crotch of every Elmo.

The manager said, ''I said to give each Elmo two test tickles; not two testicles!''

That's true Peg nursing home attendants have truly back breaking work and they often get disdain from their employers when they have to accomodate their back problems. Did you read "Nickel and Dimed"? Good book. What I have seen of the plumbers' backs is that the problems can be really severe and lifelong.

Congrats Peg!

We have it, and it's on my list, but I keep spending too damn much time in this place.




Hell.

Sorry about my "expletive deleted"ing language.

Congrats, young lady, for hitting 3:00 PM (1500)...

[quote=Desron,Apr 28 2006, 05:46 PM]
Sort of a lackadaisical day today. My lower back is going out and thought I was going to drop a couple of times this morning when doing a simple service call. Pulling out an old furnace out of a basement yesterday by myself was not a good thing to do.


I have similar lower back problems - got diagnosed with degenerative disc disease when I was 28 - so have made it through several herniated discs. And no, I do not believe in surgery to deal with this - the risk of coming out of that as a parapeligic scares me. So I tough it out with muscle relaxants and advil and then hit the exercise room to toughen up the stomach muscles one more time. Inevitably I do something stupid like not bend my knees when I'm moving furniture or something heavy. Yesterday I spent most of it on my heating pad - I over did it working out with weights the day before. You have my condolences.The Snuff

I see someone weren't payin' attention and got set up, eh? What? You drive one of them big gas guzzlin' SUVs with the mega fuel capacity too, eh? Tsk, tsk, tsk!

Geez, methinks that was easier'n usin' a circle hook!

Y'all realize how difficult 'tis been to respond to posts without bein' snarky today? Methinks I may yet slip though.

Tried to wash the blue paint off the dogs, but only seemed to spread it round more evenly. Wonder if my wife'll notice when she gets home soon? Maybe I'll just have 'em sit on either side of the patio steps and tell her they're trim, eh? If I'm gone for an overly long period methinks you can surmise she not only noticed, but didn't have a sense of humor 'bout it?

Added on edit: Methinks if anyone here has trouble usin' the quote function there's help available, eh?

That was good Winston - made me laugh.

[quote=AFTERGLOW,Apr 27 2006, 01:14 AM]
[b]Just got some new pictures of my granddaughter. Some of you may remember me posting pictures of her playing in the paraplegic wheel-chair basketball league.

Anyway, she grown like a weed since then; she graduates from High School on the 12th. Wife GLOW and I are renting a car, and driving to Oklahoma for the ceremony.

She's adorable Joe - Does she take after side of the family and does she have your sense of humor - she looks like she does. You must be very proud of her. And the photo in the bug is terrific. Love that one.

Glad to see skillet checked in. I loved the shopping story- it had me laughing out loud !

Betty: read Brookie's post to you. He knows what he is talking about.

I am back on the laptop, which is too hot to put on my lap. So it is on the desk I have had since I was about 13 (yep- ancient). Not designed for a computer and can't raise the chair, either. So, my spelling and dangling participles are bound to get worse. Plus MRPie has the radio or TV blasting from the adjacent room, so concentration is hard. The reason for this change is that SonPie is coming home tonight (maybe) and he was devious enough to set up "my" mini in his room. Long story; dumb mother.

Des: take care of that back this weekend as you plan to do. And great news on benefits.

Dear CO - Take a deep breath, thank God, and begin to steel yourself for the help you are going to have to provide Les. You will need a good radiation oncologist who can advise you on the different ways to treat this - there are new procedures out there which aren't as invasive and don't involve chemo which can be a big help. I know you are going to be inundated with physician advice - take paper and pencil with you to write down all that you are told because the info is going to get jumbled and you and Les aren't gonig to remember all of it. So prepare to take notes. My sincerest and best wishes to you and Les for a favorable outcome. The Snuff

Nicely done Red Bird!

'Tis better to give than 'tis to receive, eh?

On another subject my wife, after thinkin' 'bout it for a while, thought blue dogs was funny, eh? Who'da thunk it?

[quote=flydangler,Apr 28 2006, 05:01 PM]
I see someone weren't payin' attention and got set up, eh? [img]http://www.anjelicasboudoir.com/WEBPAGE/pics/balloons/congr[QUOTE]ats/congratulations.jpg[/img] What? You drive one of them big gas guzzlin' SUVs with the mega fuel capacity too, eh? Tsk, tsk, tsk[/QUOTE]

A big SUV I wish!

How about an 8 cylinder Dodge "HAM" Truck that needs a U-joint.

(fortunately I take the train most of the time)

[quote=Snuffysmith,Apr 28 2006, 02:09 PM]
[quote=AFTERGLOW,Apr 27 2006, 01:14 AM]
[b]Just got some new pictures of my granddaughter. Some of you may remember me posting pictures of her playing in the paraplegic wheel-chair basketball league.

Anyway, she grown like a weed since then; she graduates from High School on the 12th. Wife GLOW and I are renting a car, and driving to Oklahoma for the ceremony.

She's adorable Joe - Does she take after side of the family and does she have your sense of humor - she looks like she does. You must be very proud of her. And the photo in the bug is terrific. Love that one.

[/quote]

Thanx, sheriff.

All of the beauty comes from Wife GLOW'S gene pool, 'cause mine was brought about and quickly polluted when my (English) family arrived at Plymouth Rock and immediately started sleeping around... (I am Black German, English and Cherokee, and a bit of who-or-what ever else was hiding in the woods during the revolutionary war.)

Back to serious now: Granddaughter in the bug is also my favorite. Did you notice her license plate? JC INME. Not too hard to decipher, but here it is; Jesus Christ In Me. She really is quite the amazing young lady...

This is a crack-up... Enjoy!

She certainly has a lot of spirit and you must have a lot of fun with her. Those are great pictures.

As much as we can living 1000-miles away (Arizona-Oklahoma). E-mail and telephones help...

Joe, is this your only grandaughter? My memory must be slipping. I don't recall if you told us or not. You have a son and a daughter correct or is the blonde mom married to your son?

BTW - where's Amy been hiding! She was having some problems with her back also.

I've seen her lurkin' hither and yon, but not postin' 'twould seem, eh? Methinks she mighta hurt her hands or somethin', but I sure hope not!

Since 'twould seem everyone's bailed out for chat or whatever methinks I'll say nite all!

She is my only granddaughter. Her mom, the blonde mom, is my daughter.

And you are right, we have both a son and a daughter.

Daughter GLOW has been married since 1981. She has a son as well; he is in his second year as a senior at Oral Roberts University.

But Son GLOW hasn't been very lucky with his to attempts at being married. He dumped one, and one dumped him...

joe e

Good nite - still having problems with the connection speed and I may have to buy that 50foot cable afterall. Very disgusting. I think it just needs to be fine tuned but that's way out of my area of expertise.


Third times a charm - if I recall, he's a pretty good looking kid. My brother was 37 before he married the first time - I didn't think it would ever happen for him either.

Okay, okay, okay...got home too late for chat. Really sorry I missed you all.

But here goes..right before I left for work, I got a big bouquet of flowers...(awww...from the nice shopping challenged man you are thinking, right?) NOT...They are from a different man, that all I do is pretty much talk to and listen to, with a very nice card. (In fact, I only know his first name). The card was very nice...Something on the order of "You always brighten my day when I see you, so I thought I would surprise you, and brighten yours ..ends with if you ever want to say Hi or just talk..NAME (first, phone number)...I was so rattled, I went on to work, I need to acknowledge the flowers.

Look you guys, I can barely deal with dating one person. Multiples are out of the question. I can't really say "Mr. Shopping Challenged" is my boyfriend. I don't want to lie. So what do I do?

Oh, I do know that the flower bearer..is a retired, widowed Marine Officer. Makes him close to my heart. Has a son he has he is raising.

So am I a piece of work, or what???? Instead of just enjoying the flowers. I gotta figure out..what ta do about it? Help please.

skillet...

Good morning everyone!
(or what ever 'tis where ever you is, eh?)

Methinks wakin' up to blue dogs is definitely different! Even the cats seem a bit confused over it, eh?Is there anything between the router and where you use it that might be interferein' with the signal? Methinks a refrigerator, TV or somethin' like that'll do it. What does your signal strength indication read? Does movin' 'round make a difference?

Also do you know what standard the wireless card in your new 'puter and router are? 'Twill either be 802.11b or 802.11g, eh? Methinks you'll find the old 802.11b is much slower, and if the standard in your 'puter and router're different you may have a compatibility issue.. If that's the case methinks an ethernet cable's the only way to go.Choices, choices, all these tough choices, eh? Looks like you gonna have to make a tough one if, and methinks 'tis a really big if, either seems to be the "Mister Right" you're lookin' for.

Take your time, keep an open mind and be brutally honest with both yourself and them, eh? You're still a good lookin' sweet young lady and 'tain't like you're lookin' at a time limit or anything. Do what's best for you, not anybody else!

Well, here's hopin' the weather's great where ever y'all are at. Enjoy the day, be safe, stay well and remember to play nice!



BTW, we know the reason for Betty's absence (though she and Les're still in our thoughts) and we're pretty sure the old pig farmin' school teacher's pretty much gone (though I'm still workin' on that) but methinks there still be some absences of note, eh? Anybody got any news on any of 'em?

Mornin' you old salt...
the wind off the sea must awaken you.

Ya know some are AWOL, but Tomhye and TRoU
are back...sort of cycling...don't ya think?
I always miss Betty though...maybe Slim's Place?

We've gotta get the outside work done here early today
cause there's 100% chance of wicked thunderstorms
this evening...but we can use the rain.

I like your picture...I must be one of the guys
in the green jumpsuits...yard work. And, the
dog was cute...but made me sad...I had to put down
my 12-yr-old April this past week...she was such a
loyal pooch...sometimes I think it's harder than zappin'
homo sapiens who ask for it. Sorry, I'll try playin' nice.

Reporting in ..

Hi everyone .. and Fly and Indianhead .. you just made my morning.. thank you.

Skillet .. go for it !!! Diversity is not a bad thing .. and it gives you choices.
Besides dating is not a lifetime commitment .. its a shopping expedition. And you have already said you like shopping !!

I admit I like the sound of your retired marine. That was a lovely gesture. And what makes you think he isn't as apprehensive about the dating scenario as you are? Nowhere is it written that men don't find it as challenging as we women do. They face rejection every time they make that first overture and I would wager they feel very unsure about how that overture will be received. It's easier for us .. we get to pick and choose.

What have you got to lose ? At the very least you have a new friend and we can all use as many of those as we can get.

We are ok for those who are wondering. One day at a time as the wise oracle suggested. And today is sunny and promises to be warm and keeping busy is very good medicine. Today I am going to clean the fish pond and pumps for the waterfall and fountain, stain the garage doors(if I can figure out how to get the moldings off so I don't stain them as well) and assemble a new glider which I bought for Les to rest in by his fish pond on warmer days. It has stuffed cushions and he should be able to sit there in the sun and at least get some soul food breathing in the fresh air and sunlight. I'm determined to keep busy . now all I have to do is figure out how to do these things without screwing up !

Have a great day everyone. BTW .. I love all of you. ( I'm allowed to be mushy.. I'm old and harmless)

As I have never recieved flowers and a nice card from a retired Marine officer who is raising a son on his own, I cannot speak from experience but I think you ought to at least acknowledge the gift.

I really don't know what to tell you. As for me, if I was interested in a woman but knew she was seeing someone else, I wouldn't be sending flowers or calling her. She would be, IMO, off limits.

Good to read that (at least in your writing) your spirit is brighter than it has been CO.

Skillet - go for it. Variety is the spice of life, or to use a fishing analogy, dating is catch and release, if you don't like what you catch, throw it back for someone else to catch later.

Noonan.. get that stuff together.. I'm up to my ears at the moment but there will be a time in the near future when I run out of jobs and priorities and then I'm all yours... at least part of the time ... That's if it can wait for me.

No, most mornin's 'tis the dogs pesterin' me to let 'em out, eh? Methinks my internal clock's set for 0430 anyway, but I still set an alarm clock every night just in case. Weekends I get to sleep 'til 0500 if I can, but that's when I gotta get two munchkins (one mine, one my wife's cousin's) up to go to work and make the donuts.

That sea water's a ways away, I gotta travel two whole miles to go fishin' for stripers or blues in a tidal river runnin' through downtown, though the boat launch is almost a day trip bein' four miles away. We're actually 'bout 15 miles from the ocean though.Methinks takin' things one day at a time's helped keep me sane and sober for goin' on 22 years, so I know it works! Glad 'tis workin' for you too, eh? Nice to see you got your mornin' planned, but methinks you might wanna take it easy this afternoon, eh?Not bein' a guy, methinks it don't go against your basic instinct and genetic makeup to read the directions, eh?

Do you use big foam prefilters on your pumps? If you don't you might consider doin' so. Go to any fabric store and get the white open cell foam for cushions, then cut it to size and you'll find it cuts the need to clean pumps and filters by maybe 80%, eh? After a couple weeks use this foam starts doin' a fantastic job of biological filtration to boot!Never dated a Marine, have you? Methinks they tend to do things a little different! Guess maybe they march to the beat of a different drummer or somethin', but that ain't always bad!

Reason I know this is 'cause my second true love was a Marine Sergeant that worked at the base post office at St Alban's Naval Hospital. Unfortunately 'twas the mid-60s and race became too much to overcome, she bein' black and me mixed. She was from Queens and lived at home with her parents, who liked everything 'bout me 'cept the fact I wasn't African-American. When I left for Camp LeJeune the Marines sent her to Japan, and that was that!

The Military moves in mysterious ways when it comes to romance. If the USAF wouldn't have given my wife leave on a certain weekend almost six years ago, we never would have met.

Press Release hits the papers. The local paper was a bit miffed, I think, that they got 'scooped' by the local radio stations. BTW, the picture was taken in our back yard. I'm lucky my neighbors have nice, old trees in their yards, I liked the backdrop.

A write in candidate for mayor at the age of 19?

Please keep posting news items about yourself and your campaign. I find them very interesting reading! It's politics on a more local, personal level.

Yeah, a bunch of us were sitting around between classes and (I forget why) we decided I should run for mayor two weeks before the election. We pooled our cash and came up with $50 for my campaign. Bought a few radio spots and newspaper ads, but most of that money went to the election night party. The League of Women Voters called to apologize for not inviting me to the debate and wanted to know if I would be willing to participate, I did, it was a ton of fun - I knew I had nothing to lose, so I wasn't nervous. I got ~92 votes after campaigning for a week. Until now, I never considered what the outcome would have been if I been on the ballot and ran a 'real' campaign, but that wasn't really our intent back then, I was more of a protest against the guys that were running at the time - at least in our minds.

You know Des, I'm trying to figure out who your new avatar is. I've always heard the phrase "she's built like a battleship" but I've never seen a picture of someone like that before.

And, since you're here now Des, any predictions on who the Lions will be picking? I'm guessing the Pack will take Hawk, but I like that big TE everyone is talking about. He's someone that can help Favre out - if our line would block for him.

Sorry to hear (read) about April! No matter how sure you are having to make a decision like that really hurts and April was special.

Good job on the news release, Noonan. Like, Des, I love the updates.

Betty- where do you get your energy ? Your to-do list just for the day would take me a week.

IH- so sorry about your dog. Dogs become such a part of the family.

Doc, love the picture you posted this morning. Awesomely cool.

SonPie got home around 10:30 last night. He is a presence, to say the least.
At Easter when he was home he had a small lymph node enlargement. Last night it was quite large. I had sent him to the clinic at his university and they told him his blood tests were inconclusive. As luck would have it, he is between docs and would have to wait 2 wweeks to see the new doc here, who does not have his old records yet. But C and -P and others gave me some good advice in chat last night and I took him to a walk-in clinic this morning. I took the results of the blood tests done at the university. It was a no brainer, claimed the doc here- mono.
So the doc gave him two steroid shots in the butt ( Son hates shots !) and told him not to do much for a week except rest, drink lots of fluids and take a ton of Vit C + a multi vitamin. Also told him not to be out and about looking for a summer job yet.

Not sure what, if any, affect this will have on MrPie's travel adventure plans for us. Maybe take the kid with us ?

Skillet: I can add no more words of wisdom than others already have. Go for it.
And congrats.

Ok, I am outa here for now. Son has nuked the house with all the college stuff he has unloaded from the car. "A woman's work is never done."

Indianhead.. Tom made me feel ashamed of myself! I am taking a quick break to get Les up and then have a coffee before heading back to my to do list(which is going well.. pond is done and garage doors are well hosed down to get rid of dust and the winter's soil so now I give them time to dry before taking on removing moldings, sanding and staining) and dropped in to read as I drink my coffee. I reread your morning post and then Tom's and I feel like the most self involved person I know !

I know what it is to have to make decisions like the one you made this week and I also know its as painful as losing a family member. My sincere condolences and I'm sending you a very big hug. Sometimes those decisions are the most loving act we ever perform for our treasured companions although they are among the most difficult as well.

Pie.. the energy comes from necessity and I find the more I do the more able I am to do more. I've always been that way and physical labour has always been a friend when I need one.

I think that goes back to all those years working with my mind. It has always been a release to turn to mindless manual labour. That's why I have always loved housework( yeah, I know that's sick) I used to relish the days off when I could dig in and scrub floors, clean windows and even clean ovens. Everyone who knows me is sure I'm nuts I think. But I keep a clean house !

IH, I am so sorry to hear about April.

I had my Dante with me for a few days again. He is approaching 10. I had to leave him behind when I made a move. It was difficult and I questioned my own loyalty, but in the end what was best for him was not best for me.

I always knew I would do what I had to for that dog and that included giving him up. I never thought that was possible. Then again I never thought I'd love an animal as much as I do him or that I'd do all I did for him when he was in my care. Even now I make plans with the option of taking him back if the need or call arises.

It is impossible to know exactly what you are feeling as I haven't walked in your shoes, but in my own life I have come to know a little bit about loss.

I feel for your loss as at this time it brings some of my own to the fore. Life happens.

Hang in there

D.

You shouldn't feel ashamed of yourself! I've been keeping quiet on your situation because you've been getting great advice and support, not having anything to add or anything I could do I didn't want to take more of your time. When you get worn down like your situation does everything gets tough, I wish I was there to take whatever part of the load of that I could. I guess the only thing I don't recall seeing said strongly enough is you probably need to find SOMEONE who can take over once or twice a week to give you some R&R time, it can really recharge your batteries. Even if you just veg out or get a nap in it makes a big difference, being mentally and emotionally exhausted it a tough place to be but little things (like some breaks) can make a big difference.

Well now, it didn't take long for the 'other side' to respond.
http://www.marinettecountygop.org/index.as...1-7D126C1C38DF}
http://marinetterepublicans.blogspot.com/2...-announces.html
http://www.marinettecountygop.org/index.as...F-4A37EBAA6413}

I think it's funny, they feel so threatened by you.

If you really want to rattle their cage give me a link to a few forums out there.

I love this line as it is a standard of theirs..."Sorry Randy - but you do not represent me or my thoughts."

You really should get somebody to say "Randy Koehn - finally - somebody who represents me and my thoughts"

Go ahead, you can post as anonymous on their blog.

Noonan... it's like free advertising! They have given you a direct pipeline and targeted exposure right into their faces! I think that is a very promising and flattering development! You are hitting a nerve or they would not be paying any attention to you! I am very impressed! I would be happy (thrilled) to respond to their posts but since I am not a local resident... it may not serve you well for me to get into it with them... if you have any local supporters that are looking for some free adversing to expand your range of influence and seeking an opportunity to 'rescue' members of the kool-aid brigade... they have 'given' you a golden opportunity. Great posts by you - pulling no punches, expressing confidence, and defiance... something the Neo-cons respect in a weird sort of way!

Passed commentin' on this earlier 'cause I have a hard time dealin' with death, even when 'tis a dog or cat. Hopefully you'll understand.

Methinks I appreciate how difficult it is havin' had to do it myself a few times. Often they're unquestioningly faithful and loyal, as well as bein' a source of comfort when you ain't fit company for other humans. They don't ask for much, yet give so much in return, eh?I like to dust that one off and drag it out every once in a while. Besides, I seem to've lost track of them dancin' hippos, eh?Well, at least you've got their attention and got some kinda response from 'em, eh? Methinks you're doin' better'n me here on CGCS tryin' to get a couple folks to respond.

I see where you have come to the notice of somebody with a blog.

Listing your name in hyperlinks will make the bots pull you to the top of the charts. If only bots could vote. Wait a minute (idea)?

So Red Bird, hows them new (for you) wheels?

Added on edit: Any pictures?