In approaching the half year mark, I have noticed many changes have taken place within and around me. Spring traditionally marks birth, renewal, hope, and it enlivens a person's spirit naturally. Doves have taken over the FOB. I watch them during my breaks protecting their territory, forming bonds, and preparing a nest for their young. At the same time, the hawks linger close by. On more than one occasion, I've witnessed her swoop down and capture a feast. The dove, stifled, does not die right away. The feeling of being in the claws of death urges the other birds to fly all at once from their perches. Many times a day, I watch dozens of birds jump off their limbs and scatter: a possible shadow, glimpse of a predator, or nothing at all. This absence is brief and they soon come back to the same place. They are not living in fear, even though it lingers aily. They are simply accustomed to their surroundings. It is a natural occurring event.
Unlike America in most places, there are people who walk the streets with AK47s. Rounds are shot from time to time for all sorts of reasons;many times, they shoot for no apparent reason. There are gun trucks, many different types with various types of light machine guns mounted in the bed; they move down the city's streets at all times of the day. Another sight we in America do not get to see. They'll flip on their sirens and basically drive anywhere they want. Warning shots are fired continuously to move people back away from buildings et cetera (NOT BY AMERICANS, BY IRAQIs).
IEDs can be heard from time to time blowing up in various parts of the city. When they are close, the people scatter, but they come back soon enough and continue as if nothing happened. They don't live in fear so much as one might think. The complaints I have heard from the locals are not about IEDs or terrorists, but instead they mostly want running water and electricity.
But, I keep thinking about the IEDs. I think about the whole situation and can't help but wonder, "How in the world do these people get away with it?"
In my neighborhood, I'll stop someone if they are driving too fast! I cannot imagine what I would do if I were to catch someone planting an IED. I cannot even fathom being around one blowing up and then just going about my business like nothing happened. I cannot even consider being so unresponsive. With the number of weapons in the city, I cannot figure out why they still walk the streets, alive. Perhaps it is because, unlike the doves, they do live in fear. Perhaps for similar reasons, gangs impose themselves freely on people in parts of the United States.
I think fear does more harm to humanity than the acts themselves. The older I get, the more I realize fear drives many people's lives. Fear of losing a job, fear of not being able to make a payment, fear of not being liked, fear of dying, fear of missing out on something. I've also noticed soldiers think differently as well. There are very few American soldiers
who walk around in fear. I speak with many different soldiers who carry out many different missions, some exceedingly dangerous, but there is very little fear in their eyes, expressions, and actions. There may have been fear there when they came, but it lingers no longer. It's not about complacency or the famous line, "It won't happen to me." It's
more along the line, "There's nothing I can do if it does happen to me." This mentality is very real. This mentality, in my opinion, keeps people alive because they react with clear heads instead of ones filled with fear.
After a while, the environment accepts a person, and vice versa. After a while, when something happens daily or weekly, it doesn't have the same impact anymore. It's only a matter of time before a person changes; he/she almost has to change. Like the weather, the streets can change quickly, and not always for the bad. For example the other day, I saw a donkey cart tooling around the streets. So, I went over and waved to the driver. I would guess he was around nine or so. In any case, I felt the need to get my picture taken next to this nifty contraption and young man. I knew what I was getting into. Afterwards, the kid begged for money. "Give me dollar. Mister. Mister. Give me a dollar."
I dug through my pockets and found that I had no dollar bills, but I did have a five dollar bill.
The kid continued, "I love America. Mister. Give me money. America, I love you. I love soldiers."
Well, by now, I had three kids around me. I looked down and handed the bill to one of them. The other kid looked like he was about to cry. I noticed my mistake right away. I grabbed the bill back and placed it into the cart owner's hand. The empty handed kid was about to cry, but I think he must have read my face well because it lasted but a second. I held my right hand up and said, "That's it. Now go." One got mad and left. And the other ran away happily.
It was a fair trade. Perhaps he figures he got the best of me, but I see it like this: How many times does a guy get a picture taken with an Iraqi nine year old entrepreneur with a donkey cart?
