Miracle on Pennsylvania Avenue: Santa Claus Confirmed as FBI Head
by Susie Day / December 12th, 2007

After a brief debate, the Senate voted 98-0 today to confirm Santa Claus, bag-toting icon of festive home invasions, for a lifetime term as director of the FBI. Upon learning of the decision, Mr. Claus let out a triumphant “HO HO HO,” shook his ample red belly, and handed out gaily wrapped presents to all, senator and page alike. (Full article …)